2 weeks and 5 days....

Soon my window to the outside world will once again be covered in leaves. In the beginning- it was a safe cover, something that added privacy and color. Now the lack of coverage has allowed me to perfect my people watching skills. With the growth of new leaves, I am reminded once again that everything is a signal to the changing of the seasons, and with that, a changing of our lives.

"And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and dawn
We’re captive on the carousel of time
We can’t return we con only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game." -Joni Mitchell

Here I am, 19 years old, and in the span of 8 months I have created a life for myself that is so much different then my past 18 years. I don't do well with change and I really don't do well with goodbyes. I think one of my fears is leaving these people that I've become so close with here in "La La land" (school world). When I left home in August, I knew that eventually I would be coming home to the people that really did know me best and they would still be there for me. However, I'm now leaving people I've only know for less then a year. What will happen over the 4 months we're not in school? How many people will I call and who will actually call me? I fear that once I leave this world that I've created for myself, these people and places will vaporize into merely memories that will never be what they were right now. And that scares me. I am so happy right now. I can honestly say that I'm not ready to leave.

At some point, I realized that there is a whole world between the hours of 12-3am. I realized that spontaneously drinking on a Monday night does happen. I realized that people will change and grow and there isn't a darn thing I can do about it. And more then anything, I realize friends will show up in the most unexpected places and the most unexpected times.

Like Carly, I only wish I could find the words to describe my world...

"I can't remember all the times I've tried to tell myself to hold on to these moments as they pass."- Counting Crows

I'm glad I'm Taking the Journey...